I just came back from hanging out, so i thought why not update my blog today and I saw the last post i wrote was back in September.
It made me kinda sad and I honestly have to excuse or any solid reason for this, the only explanation that I can give is, i was too caught up with life and things around me and i had forgotten how writing was so important to me at one point is was actual therapy.
So I guess i really needed it tonight.
Christmas and New Year is around the corner, I mean obviously living in Malaysia we are not getting snow or anything but the decorations and the music at the mall on the streets makes it so festive.
I remembered when i was small I hope and i wish so hard that Santa would come to my house and maybe leave presents for me and most of you out there knows that i am born and raised in a rater conservative and also super Asian family so we dont celebrate Christmas at all. But luckily i have a few Christian friends would always invite me to church.
So from there i came to know about Jesus Christ and the actual spirit of Christmas and of course i watched Disney movies and Christmas cartoons.
I love going to church during Christmas, obviously as a kid you will receive gifts and candies and learn to sing Christmas carols.
I kind missed those good old times.
Working in a call center or service line holidays are the busiest. no holiday for me this year. Its not a bad thing, i still enjoy listening to Christmas songs and I love the smell of freshly baked cookies and festive food in the mall.
Your family back ground does not entirely determine who you are and how you will be in your life.
It is you that write your own story.
I would not judge anyone based on their education level, their religion or their background to determine who they are before i even know them.
First of all it was not their choice to be born the way they are it is like asking a person with disability why cant you walk or dance or talk or see or be like "normal people".
I strongly believe that you yourself can write your own story you can be your own master. Nothing can determine how you are or what you are.
I do not agree that you can only be with someone that is of same standard as you are, i do not agree that a happy marriage is based on the same family background or the same financial status.
What about Cinderella? or sleeping beauty or Aladin?
I believe that you determine and you manage your own happiness.
I wish that people can see each other as equal despite who they are what they are and what they believe.
Someday. someday I will find peace and my own happiness.
To Daisy:
" I miss you a lot, I do, I wished that i have the strength and courage to keep you and love you. You brought joy into our life even it was for a short period of time but I truly appreciate that I found you that fateful day. I hope that next time in the future I have the chance to love you. Susu, Kiki, Kiba, Sam, Tiger, Prince, Hersey, Donnie"
P/S Daisy was a kitten that i found at my old work place, i didnt get the chance to take care of her because of many many many many external factors, and I honestly wished that i had stood up for her and not just give up.
Someday maybe someday.
For now, love as much as you can appreciate the people around you, family, love ones, friends.
-I want to be happy and i want to be the master of my own temple.-
Happy holidays.
