How I imagined life would be

We often get ask questions for things that we have the answer but most of the time seems impossible to achieve.
Well, not all of us, there are lots of lucky ass holes out there that can project their life plans, having life goals when they are like 7.

For me, I always thought that by now, I would have traveled the world.
Do something great.
save the world or something.
Instead I'm here, taking calls in a call center.
considering myself helping this world to be a better place one phone call at a time.

You know life can be really simple if I have the courage to do it.
all these wild dreams. It's really nothing.
talk is cheap.
I can't even compare my dreams to smoke. It is basically non existence.

"What do you want in life?" Mom asked.

"Mom, i want so much in life that i dont know where and how to begin, this path that you wish to see me walk, and the path that i really want is so different. I am torn in between to see you happy and proud of me or to really live and feel happy myself. I dont wanna be called selfish, but i dont want to miss out either. It is very hard when you have so much hope in me to do something that you think i should be doing and wanting to do something that i really want to do in my life, like jumping off a water fall, a plane, go kayaking in the Amazon, swimming with dolphins, run off with the circus, travel round the world with nothing but my camera, having multiple tattoos, camping in the middle of no where, quitting my job and focusing on my body.
I want so much, so much that i dont know where to start.
I dont want to just have a job that pays a lot but kills me every time that i get a bad call, seeing the worst of the human species.
The dream of going back to basics. living and working on a farm with cows and horses and sheep.
and when night comes, laying down with the love of my life looking at the stars, hunt meteors, listening to cricket sing, smell of fresh grass and cold night air. tranquil and if you listen close enough you can even hear your own heart beat. I want to smell fresh baked bread everyday from my own kitchen. What do you think Mom?"

-unrealistic- -kinda selfish, what about us, your family?-

The city has consumed pretty most of me.
The city like a famish monster, no matter how much you feed it, the city is very satisfy.
constantly hungry, waiting to swallow the weak.

I longed for simple happiness, waiting for the sunset every evening. not to have to worry about anything.
Believing in magic.
I wish life can be this simple.


I have been contemplating on to write or not to write, but i never had a full blog drafted out till now.

Hope you guys liked it.

- petrol science was fun-