and yes you guessed it right.
I got dumped.
The love of my life (well used to be) dumped me.
After all the promises,
He said "I will not leave you."
He said "No matter what happens we will go through this together"
He said "If we break up I will not know how to love anymore"
He said...
So many promises and yet he left me. For good this time.
He left me so broken and helpless
He left be because of a small mistake i made
He left me even I can promise him the world.
He left me even we were so happy the day before.
He left me just because I needed something that he couldn't give me.
He left me just because I did not listen to him when he was trying to talk to me nicely.
He left for good.
This time for good.
I loved him with my heart and soul, i bet the whole world knows.
I loved each and every thing about him.
I love his flaws his kindness
his smile his stupid jokes.
I love the way we used to be.
I love him so much that I am willing to do anything.
We, i said we because i know both of us put or heart, tears, blood into this relationship.
Its like everything about us.
We nurture it, take care of it.
Occasional arguments, but we managed to solve it.
We were so happy last Sunday.
He promised he will make everything better again.
and yet, He left me.
It has been exactly a week now since the break up.
I regretted everything that i did.
and yes he made me feel like i am fully responsible for everything.
Not sure if i am blaming myself, but yes i caused this.
I thought he was the one.
I thought he will always come back to me.
not this time.
He seems determine and so, i will just let it be.
I did not cry as much.
My heart is so empty,
I feel like I am merely existing, a life with no goals.
We had a common goal, we were working so hard to achieve it.
I wouldn't say what we had was fake.
He loved me too, with all his heart, he changed for us. for a better future.
I am so proud of him.
I really am.
3 years. Gone. 3 years of promises and sacrifice.
3 years of having him with me all the time.
His Good Morning texts. His Good Night kisses.
Him.
as though we exists just for each other.
His name and mine fits like the perfect puzzle.
He was perfect.
Our happy times sad times.
Our songs and road trips.
The troubles we got into for being reckless.
He loved everything about me too, i wouldn't doubt that.
Actually, thank you Jay for the perfect Sundate.
Never thought that it would be our last date and last kiss last hug and last good bye.
I hope your decision is the best for both of us.
I always thought that you are the best boy friend a girl could ever ask for.
at least for me. again, you are perfect.
Our hands fit each other perfectly, your height, your smile the dimples at your back.
We shared our deepest darkest secrets.
We were a team. a pack.
I love when you can control the entire situation when i am about to have a melt down.
Thank you for the best 3 years. You have did enough.
I know nothing. no apologies can fix what i did.
How i wish that i have a time machine, if i could just turn back time.
But there's no use now.
It's final.
I kissed your mom hands, apologize that i can't take care of you anymore.
You will always have a special place in my heart.
I can't deny that it fucking hurts. I am just trying to go by each day without dying.
I wish you well.
JAY. Jay and Yoke.
singing off.
Good Bye, my love.
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