Why can't a girl ask a guy out first?
Why fat people must be shamed ?
Why must we only date our own race, same society level same skin tone same religion?
I was brought up in a very some what traditional Asian family. My parents are both teachers and my mom she really values our culture and the moral values passed down from our ancestors.
Me, we are the total opposite and I mean for those who know me in real life knows how I am as a person.
It's not saying that i do not value my own culture. Heck i love being Asian.
but i think we need to change some of the things that are going on here.
It's like who the fuck set rules that girls are forbid to ask a guy out.
To be honest I have asked a few guys out but obviously got rejected because i am Fat.
and you know they reject you cuz they shallow and you know i shallow too because i only ask the cute ones out.
But what i am trying to say here is, there is nothing wrong with expressing your affection to some one.
I like you means I LIKE YOU don't oppress yourself.
When i was young i grew up in a fisherman village and my grandma and great grandma made "Keropok" it's a traditional Terengganu delicacy.
My friends were all around the village. I mean we don't just be friends with our own skin tone and we don't judge people by their religion.
Back in the time we respect each other as a person not based on what is show on the surface.
I thought that it was suppose to be like that, I mean to see a person from within,
like my mother always say "beauty is skin deep"
and so because beauty is skin deep and my grandma and great grandma love me so much they were so afraid that I might die of hunger. oh boy they fed me. they fed me.
fast forward to teenage Yoke. She was just an ordinary girl that like boys and just wanna have a date during her school years and fancy romantic movie and books.
reality hits fast.
I remembered someone said to me" Go pee in a basin and look at your own shadow before you want my friend to date you."
Oh well, i live and maybe that person wont even remember that he said that to me but boy. I hope you burn in hell :)
and I am just this super Fat overweight girl trying to be pretty to feel good and want boys attention and want people to like me.
My parents just as typical Asian parents are not trained to handle situation like this.
I mean they are the best parents that they can be.
I guess for me what i needed was just more of the hugs and kisses and love and affection.
What i am asking for and what i am getting is like a magnet with the same direction.
and i skip to the part where i started dating.
dating MALAY guys.
oh you guys should just be in my situation a day. just one day and i pray that you understand what i mean by struggle.
at 1st i was like any typical chinese girls that know that we are forbid to date especially Malay guy because as we all know Malay guys are portray as "mat repitz' "mat pet" "pemalas" pencuri"
but i thought why am i being so racist and why on earth should i judge a person without even getting to know them?
and i said. Fuck that. We dont judge people based on their skin tone their religion or their back ground.
I started to love people as an individual, the beauty within rather than what we can see outside.
I swear this is the best decision that i have ever made.
I swear. loving people as a person is so much happier than trying to follow your social norms or what my parents would say "not acceptable, not suitable in our culture."
No it is not that i do not like my own culture. I love being a decedent of a baba nyonya. but something must change.
I dont see that my life is ruin from making the decisions i made.
I am perfectly surviving and happy.
really happy.
I am blessed to have a family that supports me financially to finish my studies and even i hated it, but dad you cant deny i did finished my degree.
I followed the path that you wanted me to, yes i am perfectly fine. but i am not Happy. I hope you understand life for me is not just about getting good results, graduate get good job with high salary get married to a rich chinese guy and start the circle all over again.
That is not me.
You can make me but i wont be happy. because that is not me.
I dont blame anyone for anything I can make my own decision and take responsible for it.
I just want to be happy. really.
This war between society norms will never be resolve if people are still doing things stereo typically.
People that are trying to give diet advise or fat shame fat people, if you were never fat before and by fat i mean you cant buy the clothes you like because they do not come in your size and you are self conscious to wear sleeveless shirt because your arms are like two huge fluffy pillows that your skinny friends love to lean on which makes you look even bigger, just dont give advise if you have never been there.
For there rest of my life i envy people who fit perfectly in dresses and can wear singlet without even a doubt. I hate myself so much that i am fat and just really dark and horrible past.
But that all will need to stop. I love who i am because fat is awesome.
-got to go cook to please my sister that i will never give me any respect-
Me, we are the total opposite and I mean for those who know me in real life knows how I am as a person.
It's not saying that i do not value my own culture. Heck i love being Asian.
but i think we need to change some of the things that are going on here.
It's like who the fuck set rules that girls are forbid to ask a guy out.
To be honest I have asked a few guys out but obviously got rejected because i am Fat.
and you know they reject you cuz they shallow and you know i shallow too because i only ask the cute ones out.
But what i am trying to say here is, there is nothing wrong with expressing your affection to some one.
I like you means I LIKE YOU don't oppress yourself.
When i was young i grew up in a fisherman village and my grandma and great grandma made "Keropok" it's a traditional Terengganu delicacy.
My friends were all around the village. I mean we don't just be friends with our own skin tone and we don't judge people by their religion.
Back in the time we respect each other as a person not based on what is show on the surface.
I thought that it was suppose to be like that, I mean to see a person from within,
like my mother always say "beauty is skin deep"
and so because beauty is skin deep and my grandma and great grandma love me so much they were so afraid that I might die of hunger. oh boy they fed me. they fed me.
fast forward to teenage Yoke. She was just an ordinary girl that like boys and just wanna have a date during her school years and fancy romantic movie and books.
reality hits fast.
I remembered someone said to me" Go pee in a basin and look at your own shadow before you want my friend to date you."
Oh well, i live and maybe that person wont even remember that he said that to me but boy. I hope you burn in hell :)
and I am just this super Fat overweight girl trying to be pretty to feel good and want boys attention and want people to like me.
My parents just as typical Asian parents are not trained to handle situation like this.
I mean they are the best parents that they can be.
I guess for me what i needed was just more of the hugs and kisses and love and affection.
What i am asking for and what i am getting is like a magnet with the same direction.
and i skip to the part where i started dating.
dating MALAY guys.
oh you guys should just be in my situation a day. just one day and i pray that you understand what i mean by struggle.
at 1st i was like any typical chinese girls that know that we are forbid to date especially Malay guy because as we all know Malay guys are portray as "mat repitz' "mat pet" "pemalas" pencuri"
but i thought why am i being so racist and why on earth should i judge a person without even getting to know them?
and i said. Fuck that. We dont judge people based on their skin tone their religion or their back ground.
I started to love people as an individual, the beauty within rather than what we can see outside.
I swear this is the best decision that i have ever made.
I swear. loving people as a person is so much happier than trying to follow your social norms or what my parents would say "not acceptable, not suitable in our culture."
No it is not that i do not like my own culture. I love being a decedent of a baba nyonya. but something must change.
I dont see that my life is ruin from making the decisions i made.
I am perfectly surviving and happy.
really happy.
I am blessed to have a family that supports me financially to finish my studies and even i hated it, but dad you cant deny i did finished my degree.
I followed the path that you wanted me to, yes i am perfectly fine. but i am not Happy. I hope you understand life for me is not just about getting good results, graduate get good job with high salary get married to a rich chinese guy and start the circle all over again.
That is not me.
You can make me but i wont be happy. because that is not me.
I dont blame anyone for anything I can make my own decision and take responsible for it.
I just want to be happy. really.
This war between society norms will never be resolve if people are still doing things stereo typically.
People that are trying to give diet advise or fat shame fat people, if you were never fat before and by fat i mean you cant buy the clothes you like because they do not come in your size and you are self conscious to wear sleeveless shirt because your arms are like two huge fluffy pillows that your skinny friends love to lean on which makes you look even bigger, just dont give advise if you have never been there.
For there rest of my life i envy people who fit perfectly in dresses and can wear singlet without even a doubt. I hate myself so much that i am fat and just really dark and horrible past.
But that all will need to stop. I love who i am because fat is awesome.
-got to go cook to please my sister that i will never give me any respect-
