14 February 2011

What's so special about to day??!!

pfffttt!!

It's VALENTINES DAY silly! :)

so.. what's so special about it?

-silence-

i don't know.

i mean. i never really celebrate valentines.

no gifts. no chocolate. no roses. no bears.

nothing.

honestly. i don't see the importance of celebrating the day. but.

a girl sure wants to be treated nice with gifts and all.

but, since then. she don't think she can see herself celebrating valentines in the future.

sounds sad??

maybe yes, maybe no.

WHATEVER!

today. is the last day here. in Kuala Terengganu.

i skipped 2 lectures today. LOL

going to back to college tomorrow, starting my new semester.

I hope it will be a great sem!

i can't wait to back actually. :)

i want to break free!

staying at home. I've had enough.

no more.

then my frequency of writing and facebooking will drop.

due to the shit reception of broadband signal at the hostel area.

or maybe miracle happens!! :D

New Semester.

New energy

New enthusiasm!

it's going to be a good day today.

i don't want to think other than that though.

-Your name is the name forever on my lips-

A date with spring

i prefer nothing than something more but will hurt me in the end.

i prefer friends that really know me well inside out than a bunch of friends that only know how i look.

if physical is really that important for my future.

i really would do my best to improve it.

it's only for me. and no one else.

fingers dancing on the keyboard.

i love the sound old type writes more.

i love it when four of us hangout and talk about anything everything and nothing but rubbish.

and sometimes we do pour out a lot to each other.

the days spent together. the way you all accept me as i am.

all of these means a lot to me.

but, maybe the hurt is too deep.

sometimes. i really don't know what to think or what to trust.

it's my own doings that cause this.

what should i do.

the gap and distance is too far.

it had been lapse by time.

only songs that can remind me of the vivid memories.

after my primary.

i tried so hard just to erase everything.

to avoid everyone.

to be invisible to them.

don't you know, it hurts more than anything just to see people we used to be "close" with

ignore you. as if they never meet you before.

the millions of questions that pops up in my mind in the flash second.

i really don't know where to get the answer.

some times i don't get it when.

others criticizes questions that people ask and solutions that people seek.

i wonder why are they hurting others just to boost their self esteem.

why people ignore others after they have the other half.

The world is contaminated. doomed. crooked. crowded. dammed. polluted. hopeless. helpless.

bits and bits of good in the world is gone day by day.

aren't you aware of that?

why aren't you sad?

why isn't anyone doing anything to stop this?

if by writing. i can stop everything. i would write.

but i guess.

my writing is nothing but crap.

people just don't know me.

i am no super woman or wonder girl.

i ain't super model or pretty face.

i am just me.

i guess that's all for tonight.

read it or leave it. it's up to you.

Thanks :)

I love you.

i want to love you till the end

but dear,

you don't get it neither do they.

the difference between us.

are unchangeable.

they are trying so hard to tear us apart.

and we will eventually give in.

my mum would say this is rubbish and not mature.

maybe she's right.

what are we fighting for?

forever and always.

i know you want to. :)

you are a good guy.

yes you are.

and i am a lucky girl.

no. i am to selfish to let you go just yet.

not now.

-if it can be changed, it will say i do. there will always be a but-

Chinese New Year 2011

Since small i loved Chinese New Year

my parents would bring me to Yong Peng. (my mum's hometown)

and there i will meet everyone! :)

my cousins, and my relatives. Most important, my grandmother.

though i am not really close with the adults but i really enjoy playing, running around whole day!

with the kids.

as i grow older. there's less running and more heart to heart.

i love talking to them.

listening to their complaints, their encounter with weird teachers at school and many more.

I felt free. just to stand in the middle of the road.

to look at the palm trees. and to feel the wind.

despite the flies.

i love everything there.

The FOOD especially!

i eat and eat as much as i could! seriously!

i don't get that at home everyday.

and the best part is eating together.

we are a BIG family. and whenever we go out visiting or even eating out.

it feel as if people are afraid of us. we out numbered everyone. ;)

i love it.

i appreciate the days i spent there, although sometimes the kids really makes me want to RIP their heads off. but i still enjoy it. :)

the best part of Chinese New Year is not getting red packets.

for me, it's the time we spent with our families. to bond with each other.

for some of us that only meet each other once a year.

it's an opportunity that kills to get.

i slept soundly each night.

no more nightmares no more weird dreams.

i slept early each night and woke up early to see food on the table. ready to be eaten. :)

i spent my every second talking and laughing.

I love FIRECRACKERS! i love the sound of it. when every house in that area are celebrating.

i love the laughter of kids.

i love the greeting and wishing when red packets are distribute.

i love it when we would line up. from the youngest to the eldest and i would always be at the back. :)

I will really miss them.

my babies :)

i remembered my grandmother telling me.

we are the closest relative. we are a family, she told me to take some time off to visit her.

my dad, he's the only child in his family so. i don't have anyone in Kuala Terengganu. really.

all i have is them.

well, guess what. all i did was smile and nod my head.

i wish i could do more than that.

there are tons of pictures taken.

i will definitely upload them as soon as my sisters finish editing them.

glad that you came.

thanks :)

glad that you said that.

thanks again :)

besides them, you are all i have.

:)

-Happy Chinese New Year-