What happiness mean to you?

You once told me real happiness come from simple little things.
Rich people, they may be rich but they are not happy.
They can have all the money in the world but they can never buy happiness, like what we had.

Walking in the park, vaping on the lake.
Taking in the evening sun.
You bringing me to explore things, you showed me so many.
You gave me hope, excitement.
You taught me simple happiness.
I was so ready to be with you, you showed me how our forever would look like.
You promised you would write a song for our wedding.
We would get married and have a simple happy life.
You told me you were ready.

You made me realized I wasn't really happy before us.
Don't get me wrong I am forever grateful for what my parents gave me.
But with him, it was different.
He showed me, not just to see things with my eyes but my heart.

and here i wish to tell you, I am still the same girl that did not, will not ever care about your status, education race or religion.
I loved your soul, it felt like i finally found the missing pair of sock, the lost hair tie, the bobby pins that i dropped.

I wish you loved mine.

How can someone this perfect, just left me to die.
You swear to the stars that you wont leave me, but you did, twice.

Is leaving me your happiness?
what does happiness really mean to you?

After you left, happiness followed.
I was beyond lost. It felt like i was blind folded, in a maze, forced to find the exit.

Time, i would say, helped.
I started to feel like i can be happy again.

When I was talking to my street friends, i realised that everyone came to the city, full of hope and dreams, sadly not all hopes and dreams can be granted by the city.

They became what they had to when the city fails them.

I love walking with a bunch of people around the city, on Wednesday night just to catch a glimpse of hope in their eyes when we talk to them.
Telling us their stories, hoping that one day someone can help them, or just to understand their decision.

He is also the reason i stopped reading, watching, romance books, movies.
because what i had with him was far better, it was real.

but you left.

-They said spring is the season for love, I wonder will I ever find love or will love ever find me?-

I guess not.